(George Formby / Eddie Latta)
It's my Auntie Maggie's home-made remedy
Guaranteed never to fail
That's the stuff that will do the trick
Sold at every chemist's for one-and-a-kick
If you've got lumbago, rheumatics or gout
Or a pain in your Robert E. Lee
Don't kick up a shindy
You'll never get windy
With Auntie Maggie's remedy
There's all sorts of medicines that you can buy
No matter what ailment you've got
I know a special one you ought to try
You'll find it's the best of the lot
I went to the doctor, I wasn't too well
He made me lie on the settee
He said, Trouble's brewing - you've been overdoing
Your Auntie Maggie's remedy
When the baby starts crying and there isn't a reason
If you inspect him you'll see
The poor little chappie has covered his nappie
With Auntie Maggie's remedy
To a young lady's bedroom I went by mistake
My intentions were honest, you see
She burst out with laughter, I know what you're after
It's my Auntie Maggie's remedy
Now I know a girl, and she's putting on weight
In a place where she oughtn't to be
So I said to Nellie, You'd better rub your - ankle
With Auntie Maggie's remedy
(as sung by The Spinners)