(Stuart MacGregor)
Chorus:
My father's name was Harry
My mother's name was Anne
Come sit beside me come dry all my tears
I've been wronged by a Sandy Bell's Man
The month it was May and the lilac smelt sweet
I was strolling one evening round town
When I met a young maid over Morningside way
And she sobbed as she hung her head down
I see by your scarf of the scarlet and gold
An Edinburgh medic are you
Come sit beside me come hear my sad tale
It concerns a young medic like you
When I was sixteen I was spotless and clean
I had never tasted a drop
I met a young medic whose name it was Derek
He took me into that bad shop
And there o' the nips o' the whisky and gin
I verily drank my fill
My father he shot himself over my shame
And my mother he likewise did kill
One morning in haste to my lover I raced
And to him these same words I did say
My darling I think that next summer or spring
An arrival is coming our way
The whites of his eyes grew wide with surprise
As the eyes of a young father will
But when I called round at his digs the next day
He had caught the first plane for Brazil
So come all ye virgins of Edinburgh city
Although ye be ever so few
Come sit beside me come hear my sad tale
It concerns young maidens like you
Beware take warning before ye be burned
Fatal not yet is the hour
The next time a medico glances your way
Be content with a hot and cold shower
(as sung by Liz & Maggie Cruickshank)