Henry's Songbook

As I was slowly driving from a folksong club one night
A police car overtook me, gave me such an awful fright
Two policemen then approached me and they said, We think you're fu'
I looked from one to the other and I answered, *** to you

And they said -
How many whiskies did you have tonight
How many have you consumed
The answer my friend is blowing in the wind
You'll know when you blow up this balloon

I blew the breathalyzers and I burst them one by one
So they took me to the station that's where the fun began
They handed me a bottle but it was rather small
I did my best to please them and flooded out the hall

And the policeman he did roar
Hallelujah
Then he made me wash the floor
Hallelujah

Since that sad chapter in my life I haven't touched one drop
I've tried cigars and cigarettes, I've found they're not much cop
I've tried going out with women and it's not bad it's true
But I've come to this conclusion I'll tell it now to you

I've been a folksinger for twenty-five years
I've drunk more than my share of those whiskies and beers
But the judge took my licence, kicked me out the door
So I never will drive my white Rover no more

And it's no nay never
No nay never no more
Will I drive my white Rover
No never no more

Tunes ?, Blowing In the Wind, ?, Michael Row the Boat Ashore, ?, Wild Rover

[1990:] Actually, it was a blue Rover - but that didn't seem right for the song. I originally used Tom Paxton's song Day at the Zoo instead of the Wild Rover, but I found nobody knows it over here [on the Continent] so the joke gets lost. (Iain MacKintosh, pr. comm.)

[1991:] I play the bagpipes, and I played them a lot then, and when I blew up the breathalyzers, they went pouf! - three times! They were not happy policemen! (Intro Iain MacKintosh)