Henry's Songbook

I came from the plane saw the customs man was standing there
And everybody shuffling like they're hiding something they should declare
Then it caught his eye, Come here, he said, I said, Why
All he would say
We check everyone with a suitcase shaped like that

He turned me inside out and then he turned me upside down
Because a banjo player is not the most respected man in town
But he said I was o.k. and he sent me on my way
All he would say
We check everyone with a suitcase shaped like that

Then I wanted some insurance for this crazy life of mine
I read all the papers, signed on the dotted line
But then it caught his eye, he said, Medical check, I said, Why
All he would say
We check everyone with a suitcase shaped like that

He made me take off my clothes, he looked in my eyes and my ears
And in one or two places I'm sure you would rather not hear
But he told me I was fine so I grabbed those clothes of mine
All he would say
We check everyone with a suitcase shaped like that

It was late one night at a club, I was going away
This pretty girl came up, she said, Iain, would you like to stay
When I asked her why she smiled and winked one eye
All she would say
I check everyone with a suitcase shaped like that
And she did

(as sung by Iain MacKintosh)