Henry's Songbook

Too-ral-oo-ral-oo-ral-oo
They're looking for monkeys up in the zoo
Says I, If I had a face like you
I'd join the British Army

When I was young I used to be
As fine a man as ever you'd see
The Prince of Wales he said to me
Come and join the British Army

Sarah Condon baked a cake
'Twas all for poor old Slattery's sake
She threw herself into the lake
Pretending she was barmy

Corporal Daly went away
His wife got in the family way
The only thing that she could say
Was, *** the British Army

Corporal Kerry got such a drought
Just give him a couple of jars of stout
He'll kill the enemy with his mouth
To save the British Army

Kilted soldiers were no drawers
Won't you kindly lend them yours
The rich must always help the poor
To save the British Army

Repeat 1

Final chorus:
Too-ral-oo-ral-oo-ral-oo
They're looking for monkeys up in the zoo
Says I, If I had a face like you
I'd *** the British Army

[1977:] [The Hungry Army] Charlotte Fen's tune and words are reminiscent of the tune and at least the opening verse of another derisive song, Join the British Army. (Palmer, Soldier 81)

[1990:] This song of Irish origin has circulated both inside and outside the army since Victorian times. [...] Singers would insert at appropriate points the names of NCOs they disliked. (Palmer, Lovely War 25)